Starting the Conversation About Rehab for Addiction

Many often subscribe to the idea that there are certain things you just don’t talk about. A friend’s personal problems might be one of them. Like most, you might assume that if your friend wants help, he or she will ask for it.

Unfortunately – statistically – conversations where that friend actually reaches out for help are unlikely to happen. The National Survey on Drug Use and Health reports as many as 95 percent of those who need specialty treatment for addiction don’t believe they need it. What this means is if you believe a friend is struggling with an addiction that may be worsening, you will most likely have to be the one reaching out and starting the rehab conversation.

What signs indicate ‘I need rehab’?

If you notice your loved one participating in addiction-related behaviors, it can be challenging to know how to start the conversation. Should it even be a topic to bring up, you may be wondering. Consider certain scenarios and ask yourself these questions to help you determine whether or not it’s time to broach the subject of recovery:

• Does he or she partake of drugs or alcohol all the time, or only when they made are available?
• Does he or she experience significant personality changes or mood swings after having a drink or taking drugs?
• Has he or she experienced troubling side effects (e.g., increased sickness, memory loss)?
• Has he or she withdrawn from you and spent more time with those who provide him or her with drugs or alcohol?
• Has his or her drinking or drug use affected your friendship, other relationships or job status?

If you can answer some or all of these questions with a “yes,” then the time has come to talk with your friend about substance abuse treatment.

How to talk someone into going to rehab

There are certain factors to take into consideration when starting the conversation about rehab and addiction treatment. Obviously, this is a sensitive topic for your friend and possibly an uncomfortable one for you, so empathy, compassion and gentleness should be the virtues guiding everything you discuss.

1. Make sure your loved one is sober

The conversation will not go well if anyone is under the influence. Timing is crucial for when you have this discussion, so make sure it is had when your loved one has the time to talk with you, is not being interrupted or stopped in the middle of a task and has not recently been consuming substances. The desire for change needs to come from within your loved one’s heart and mind, and that is best done without any substances influencing their behavior.

2. Use “I feel” statements and give concrete examples

Your loved one needs to know they are not being attacked and they should never feel the need to be defensive. When bringing up signs of addiction you’re seeing in their life, you need to use specific examples and statements that start with, “I feel.” For example, “I feel like when you’ve had a stressful day at work, you handle it with alcohol and it often seems like you drink more than you intended to.” Allow your loved one to dialogue about the statement, and listen openly.

3. When your friend talks, you listen

If you’re going to bring up the conversation, you must also be prepared to hear what they’re going to say – even if what they say is really hard to swallow. Try to absorb any of their anger, as this is likely a difficult topic for them. Don’t let them treat you poorly, but don’t be surprised if they say things they probably do not mean. And if they share challenges, fears or concerns with you, be empathetic and show them through your active listening that you care deeply about their wellbeing and are here to help.

4. Ensure them you are here to help

Being helpful takes many shapes – maybe you help by researching treatment facilities with them and remaining present while they make the initial call. Maybe you offer to drive them to therapy sessions or attend family counseling meetings with them. Possibly, if the two of you live together, you show support by purging the cupboards so the house is a dry environment in which recovery can flourish and temptation can’t grow. Little actions like these speak volumes to a recovering loved one.

Programs to lead loved ones to recovery

While encouraging your friend to seek treatment for their struggles with substance abuse may be difficult, the good news is that neither of you is alone in this process. We at High Focus Centers are here to help every step of the way through counseling, education and support for both the recovering individual and their friends and family.

To get in touch with an admissions counselor today, contact High Focus Centers.